Each Birth Has A Unique Story

Ever since Lily was born I find myself comparing the births of my daughters. As time passes I think about it less but it is something my husband and I enjoy chatting about. Both birth stories are posted below but I wanted to write about the similarities and differences between them.

Labor. With V I got to the hospital at 8cm and although at that point I felt every contraction they were tolerable and I would just close my eyes through them. I could not sit so I would stand through them. With V there was no pitocin but since L was an induction there was pitocin from the start. Let me tell you that the word on the street is true...contractions with pitocin are 10 times worse than normal ones!!! I was in pain and with every contraction I would squeeze my husband's hand and would find myself screaming Matt, Matt, Matt very very loudly. They came fast and furious!

Pain relief. I got an epidural with V and it was not too bad to get other than my flinch when the catheter was placed. I just breathed through the contractions. Then my last few hours of labor were very peaceful and we just watched tv and chatted. With L getting the epidural was pure hell. I kept flinching and I could not get my back to curl just right and every contraction hurt so very very bad! I was near tears. I thought I was only a few centimers dilated so I seriously wanted some relief. Of course by the time it was push time the epidural was still not in affect and did not start to work until I was pushing and by then it was still only the tingly leg feeling of numbness, not the full blown feel nothing like with V.

Push time. With V I felt no contractions so they told me when to push. I did not like this. Pushing those 40 minutes was the hardest part. With L I still felt every contraction so I told them when I wanted to push. I actually liked pushing with L, I had the urge to push and until the doc got there I actually had to not push, no real pain just pushing with the contractions.

She is here. With V I screamed once when I pushed her head out and then the doc sort of turned her and she just slide out the rest of the way and I did a mild scream then. With L I did not scream when she came out. I pushed her head was told to then wait a second and then I pushed out her body. Both were placed on my chest immediately.

First look. With V my first thought was of pure relief that this human child was now out of me (did I mention I really hated pushing her out). Then I looked at her in pure disbelief that I now had a baby girl. It was very surreal. I just kept looking into her eyes that were looking at everything in the room while she took it all in. With L the first thoughts and feelings were of pure happiness and love. Not that I loved her more it just felt like I was more prepared this time around. I kept kissing her all over even though she was covered in goo.

Breastfeeding. With V she immediately latched on like a pirrana. It hurt! Chomped down as hard as she could. She breastfed great but those first few weeks were hard. I was tired, she hardly every slept unless she was nursing. I had the bruised and cracked nipples but I kept going and after that our breastfeeding journey was easy going for 15 months except for thrush around month 14 that was easily fixed. With L she immediately latched on gently and it never hurt. I did suffer from some awful thrush week 2-4 but we worked through it and it has been easy sailing every since. I do have to pump every morning before work so she has something to eat in the mornings but so far so good.

Sleep...so far. V has never been a good sleeper. From the beginning things were very HARD and my husband and I were very very very tired. Around month 9 I brought her to bed with us and I nursed her laying down on my side and we finally started getting sleep. L has been a great sleeper from day 1. Slept 5 hours a night from the day she was born and around week 6 she moved it to around 6-10 hours a night. Such a huge difference. We are not tired and feel very refreshed.

Overall V was a very difficult baby and a lot has to do with her sensory processing disorder which I did not know about till 18 months. Looking back there were lots and lots of signs (for a different post one day). L is so incredibly easy. She will play with toys, lay on her back and enjoy looking at toys of which V did none of. L is incredibly easy to take out and with V we did not take her many places for over a year...it was just too hard.

I still enjoy going over their birth experinces in my head. It is like this specialy memory that only I have and it always makes me feel good when I think about them.

I am not ready for a Toddler....

This weekend my 20 month old daughter decided to climb out of her crib for the very first time. Which inevitably meant converting her crib over to her adorable toddler bed. The entire thing frightens me since she is not even close to sleeping through the night yet. She is still unable to soothe herself back to sleep despite trying every method out there, but that would be a whole other blog post. On night 2 of the big switch my husband put Violet to bed and left the room and shutting the door behind him. She ran after the door calling Daddy but moments later she was quiet. Fifteen minutes later I decided I just had to check on her (despite husband saying otherwise). When I enter her room she is sitting in the glider in the corner, holding her favorite stuffed animal, Brobee, with an empty bottle in her mouth that husband accidentally left on the nightstand, all while flipping through her Thomas the Tank Engine Board book. She just looked up at me as if to say "I was not ready for bed yet and if you will not read to me I will just have to do it myself." She does this with a room that is very very dark. She looked adorable. I walked her back to the crib and said she had to go to sleep. She cried and pointed at her book and I let her have it. She fell asleep holding the book. Every night this week she has fallen asleep with a book and Brobee. She definitely gets her love of books from me.

Side note: I never let her sleep in her bed with her bottle but that night I did not have the heart to take it. It was empty and she had taken it off the nightstand all by herself. I breastfed for 15 months and I never should have started the bottle but that will be a whole other issue in a few months to deal with.